Putul

Putul

My heart is breaking,

the blood within me draining,

I'm now a porcelain doll.

I long for release,

for tears to sweep over me,

for I forgot where I hid them.

Buried deep somewhere inside,

Behind the porcelain they hide,

Break through me and find them.

I'm cracked but too stubborn to break,

So I carry this heavy weight,

Shatter me with all that you are.

And as the pieces fall,

May the tears come along.

In brokenness you bring me back to life. 

I debated whether or not to put this up. It is up on facebook after all, but it’s kind of a glimpse into my heart lately and well, it’s personal. But it’s real and it better will give you and idea of how to be lifting me up. Know that this is not how I feel all of the time, but lately it has been what the enemy is using to discourage me. But I fight against it with this: ‎

"So we do not loose heart though our outer self is wasting away our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing us for an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen for the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal." 2 corn 4:16-1

as well as many other truths from my Father. Maybe you feel the same way sometimes and relate. I don’t know. Either way I feel like I should share this with you. PS: Putul means doll.